Always on Call

I remember when my stepfather used to work for a trucking company back when I was very young. There would always be those nights when he wore the beeper, meaning he was at the company's mercy, at all hours of the day and night. I remember thinking how unfair that was for him. He couldn't have too many drinks with dinner and it was inevitable that tiny pager would start blaring in the middle of his favorite show or mid-snore. But the beauty of his pager was that after his shift was over, he could finally turn the thing off.

Oh, if I could only be so lucky. I don't have a need for a pager. There are no annoying beeps to wake me in the middle of the night or to force me off the couch during a particularly juicy scene from "Desperate Housewives." I might as well have one, because it is during those times that the boys start in, needing a new diaper, more food, a fresh sippy cup, a toy repair, and on and on.

I am always under the radar. They have no qualms about waking me up from a deep sleep so I can stumble around a room and crawl under a crib in search of a binky. They don't care if the muse suddenly strikes me and I have to absolutely get something down on paper. Those are the moments they have a nasty diaper blow out or a conked head on the linoleum floor.

Even this past week, Robbie was on vacation and I was doing the happy dance. Finally! It won't be JUST MOMMY in the house all day. I had visions of sleeping in until 9:00, tapping away on the computer and sending off some stories...which of course would lead to riches and glory.

HA!

Monday morning I was all set to sleep in. Chops wasn't having it. He has no problem if Daddy is sleeping, but if Mommy dares to stay behind the closed bedroom door, he throws his full 35 pounds of boy into the door, screams, and whines until I completely give up on the stolen hours of sleep and stomp out to the kitchen for a pot of coffee. Ditto for a peaceful shower. Or for that story that will never be written.

Where is the off button on this Mommy pager? Can somebody please show me? I think the last time that it was truly off was during our girls trip to Tahoe back in May. There I could stay up as late as I wanted because no one would be waiting in my room to wake me up at dawn. There I could keep the shades closed and lounge in bed until 3 in the afternoon.

Oh, please take me there again!